How Big is the Chicken in Your Department?

Chinese students who are studying English repeatedly get certain words confused with others...for example, I have heard 'chicken' substituted for 'kitchen' (and vice versa) countless times! I don't think I'll ever get sick of hearing students say, "My mom spends a lot of time in the chicken" or "I caught a kitchen." :) Some other examples are: walk/work, apartment/department, daughter/doctor, snake/snack, thirsty/Thursday, angry/hungry and probably the most common, he/she. In Chinese there is no difference between he and she, they use the word 'ta' for both so this mistake is made in every class I teach! Usually I can follow the students easily enough if they start with a sentence like, "my sister..." but often times as they continue to talk they will refer to 'his bike' or 'somebody told him.' This is when MY listening skills are really tested!

Last night Tony and I went to get massages and I started thinking about this topic because about halfway through our massages he looked at me and said, "I just took a little snap" (nap). Sooo cute! This is another, what I had presumed to be, mistake but my co-workers just told me that this is actually British-English. Really? Anyone know for sure? Oh well, even if it is British-English it still sounds pretty cute to my American ears!

More from Hunan

Even though my trip to Hunan was a month ago, I still want to share some other stories and pictures from our visit. From the map below, you can see Hunan in the southern part of China, highlighted in orange. Southern China in most Chinese people's eyes = spicy food, the willingness to eat any kind of meat or insect that dares to cross your path, and no indoor heating during the winter. My mom and I experienced 2 out of 3 of these, probably saved from eating too many strange meats because of Tony's constant reminder to his mom about what was acceptable for us. (Although, my mom did eat frog legs which was probably out of her comfort zone...for me, eh, tastes like chicken.) I LOVED the spicy food! Tony's mom makes a smoked bacon dish that can only be described as "a party with your taste buds being the VIP guest." Now, back in Tianjin the food seems somewhat bland...good thing Tony's mom filled his suitcase with beef, bacon, sausage, fish and chicken that we've been enjoying for the past several weeks! :) We also had to get used to life without indoor heating, which included wearing our winter coats at ALL times while inside and even being able to see our breath when it got into the evening hours. We spent a lot of time sitting around a small table with a huge, thick blanket flung over the top, housing underneath some hot coals to keep our toes warm.

Apart from the wedding festivities, there were a few other Spring Festival traditions that we took part in. On the eve of Spring Festival we had a HUGE dinner...a feast enjoyed by the 5 of us and before the dinner we took time to recognize our grandparents. Tony's mom prepared 5 bowls of rice and meat (one for each of his grandparents who have passed on and one bowl to represent my grandparents and their many years to come). His dad lit firecrackers outside and then the "ceremony" was over, almost as quick as it began! That night we played Mah jong, watched the nationwide broadcast of the Spring Festival Gala and amplified our speaking while the fireworks grew louder and louder as midnight approached. It was great fun to watch my mom's reaction to the fireworks...I've blogged about this before and still say that it is not something that can be described, you have to witness it. I believe she would agree.

Another interesting aspect of the trip was our day at Tao Hua Yuan, a famous garden near Tony's hometown. The story is that a gifted poet wanted to find a place which was free from all of the noise and corruption of the city and government. So he searched for miles and miles around southern China before he found a large, secluded piece of land filled with peach blossom trees and created a kind of utopia there for himself. Tony and I took this opportunity to take some very unofficial engagement pictures...those and some other highlights of Tao Hua Yuan are included below!

I Am Marriageable

One of the requirements of getting married in China is proving that I am, in fact, single in my home country. So yesterday I made the trip to the U.S. Embassy in Beijing to sign an affidavit which proves my marriageability.

Going to the U.S. Embassy is always an experience in itself. The last time I went, for example, Tony was with me...he was trying to get his visa for the states and I was adding more pages to my passport. I was ushered in with a friendly, "Welcome to the Embassy!" while he was thumbed in the direction of a looong line of other Chinese citizens whom also were applying for a visa. I could just see the visions of red, white and blue dancing in their heads as I walked past all of them to the front of the line. Even though it's my Embassy, I still cast my eyes downward in the shame of getting to go in front of all of them, leaving my boyfriend at the back of the line.

This time the process was much the same. I skirted past the line directly into the Embassy and went to the 2nd floor where all of the other American citizens were waiting patiently to be helped. I filled out a form, paid some money for the notary, then had to stand with my right hand raised as I swore that I have never been married before and that I am legally eligible to be married in China. They asked me some questions about Tony and I to be sure that it was legit then they sealed the document and handed it over with an enthusiastic, "Congratulations!" Congratulations...your marriageableness has been legally declared!

Ingleby, Zhao, Ingleby-Zhao: An Open Debate

Western culture (traditionally): Bride takes Groom's family name
Chinese culture: Bride keeps own family name

Recently I've been having a debate in my head (and aloud with Tony and some friends around here) about the above topic. What to do? As we've all probably figured out, I'm not the most traditional American on the block so maybe I would be having this debate even if I married an American guy.

On the one hand, I love being an Ingleby and all that "being an Ingleby" represents. Those of you who are Inglebys (or are close to ANY Ingleby) can understand my dedication to this name. Plus, since this is not a Chinese tradition, Tony is not pushing me one way or the other. Sure, he's excited about the possibility of me changing my name to his but he doesn't feel too strongly that I do.

On the other hand, I understand how having the same name can represent unity in the family and can simply be easier for legal and child-raising purposes. I guess I have always thought that I would take my husband's last name but now that the time is nearing, I'm not totally convinced.

Now is when I turn to you for advice...I know that plenty of you out there will have opinions so here's your opportunity to go for it! Convince me! Outcome: TBD following debate. :)

PS...details for your consideration...Tony's family name is Zhao (pronounced 'Jow')