These are the Days (8)

Monday morning I woke up with a heavy heart. Not only did we have to leave paradise today but we had to say goodbye to (most) of our family and friends. I hate goodbyes.

Haike and I started packing right away, which turned out to be a total disaster...our bags were a mess and we had a lot of additional things to squeeze in. After about 30 minutes I needed a break so we went up to have breakfast with everyone. Our guests were in different stages of packing up - some had their bags already waiting patiently to be put in the van, others were searching for any nook or cranny to make all the new purchases fit.

Before anyone left, the picture-taking began! We took pictures together and with the new friends we'd made throughout the week. Then, we pulled in our wedding planners, the resort staff, the waitress who'd helped us all week, even our drivers for more pictures. Everyone was making sure that those new faces would forever be cemented into our memories.







The first group to go was Haike's parents, Yiqi and our Tianjin friends. They were headed into town to either catch their flight or do some more shopping! As I mentioned in an earlier post, the relationship that Haike's mom formed with my family (especially my grandma) was so special. That morning my grandma asked me how to say, "I love you" in Chinese so I taught her. She went to Haike's mom and did the best she could to say it! It was so cute!! When they hugged each other goodbye they were both crying and even Haike could not believe that his mom was crying. It was such a special moment when the car pulled away and my grandma was still wiping at the tears. We talked about how communication just doesn't seem to matter as much - if you connect with someone, you connect no matter how many 'words' you can actually use. This was a big lesson for all of us who witnessed this moment.

The next group to go was mine. Haike and I were headed to Krabi, a seaside city in southern Thailand. (If you look at the map that I posted back on Day 1 you can see where Krabi is in relation to Chiang Mai.) Going along with us for the first few days were my dad, Kristi, grandma, Uncle Mike and two of Haike's best friends from Tianjin. It was what Laura named our, "family honeymoon." Ha! Actually, we were happy to spend more time with them and we knew we would have several days on our own after they had to leave...it ended up working out very well! We said our goodbyes to the remaining five (mom, Lindsey, Laura, Beth and Janine) and headed to the airport to catch our flight to Phuket. This was one scene on the flight in...



We could already see that it was going to be breathtakingly beautiful in Krabi and we could hardly wait for some much needed beach and relaxation time!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...uh, resort... The last five were getting ready for their final sightseeing adventure before taking the red-eye back to the states. Here is one picture from the temple that they visited...



So now the Chiang Mai chapter comes to a close. I truly hope that you have enjoyed this wedding-blitz as I have dug deep into my memories to paint the pictures for you. For those of you who were not there, I hope that from these stories you felt a little bit like you were sitting in one of those white chairs among us. It has been a blessing for me to document these events - to create an 'e-journal' that will always contain this unforgettable week. For those of you who were there, we share a small treasure that can never divide us. You were a colorful flourish on this canvas and you contributed so many details which made this painting a masterpiece. Haike and I will forever be grateful to you for sharing in this special, special week with us. We talked recently about how blessed we are...having so many people that we love in this one exotic place for this one perfect event. You know how they always say, "once in a lifetime." To us, this week was exactly that - it could never be replicated with such perfection. We hope you will carry the same memories of joy, peace and love that we do.

My next, and last post about the events in Thailand, will be some stories from Krabi...stick around to hear about monkeys, an ocean-view room and seafood heaven.

Sunshine Day (7)

Sunday, the day after the ceremony and reception, is a bit of a blur to me now. I do remember that some of our guests left and I had a major cry-fest, feeling like my heart was being ripped out (again) when saying goodbye to those who I knew I might not see again for a long while. You know who you are!

There was still a lot of excitement lingering in the air from the previous day, though, and people talked about the events non-stop, reliving every moment.

Haike and I joined everyone for a late breakfast, bragging about our BEAUTIFUL honeymoon suite. Several people went to ride elephants that morning and the rest of the remaining guests got involved in card games, taking a tour of our honeymoon suite or resting up from the day before. Me? I became a fixture at the pool...staying there most of the afternoon and achieving my first sunburn of the trip. It was sooo lovely to sit there with my book (that I never opened), talking to family and friends and hearing delighted squeals from the card players. Bliss. Pure bliss.



Late that afternoon we all got cleaned up and loaded into two big vans (there were 22 of us altogether). We went into Chiang Mai for the famous Sunday market, which is quite different from the night market that we perused earlier that week. The Sunday market is where local artists can showcase and sell their work. Some of the items there are extremely unique and we headed out immediately to begin our shopping. The big group broke into several small groups but Haike and I stuck close to Emilie and Dietrich who were leaving the market early to catch their flight home. We enjoyed some local snacks along the way...



Everyone stayed at the Sunday market for several hours, grabbing dinner there and continuing to look around at the endless things to buy. Most people were buying souvenirs but Haike and I only picked up a few paintings of the cutest elephants that are now hanging in our apartment. We lovingly named them, "Belle" and "Villa" after the resort that provided us with so many amazing memories.

After running into most of our family and friends at some point throughout the evening, Haike and I broke off from the group to enjoy hour-long foot massages. We'd had enough shopping and were ready for some time away from the hustle and bustle of the busy market. When we met the others to go back we were amazed at our Chinese friends. They had bought SO MUCH!! Chai, who is pictured below, especially drew our attention. He'd spent every Thai baht that he had in his wallet. Man, that boy can shop!!!



We returned to our resort for the final night in Chiang Mai...how can that be? Were we leaving already? Although I was extremely excited for the next part of the adventure to the seaside, a part of me felt sick to my stomach. So many months of planning, so many details arranged, so many emails sent, so many smiles, so much laughter. Could it be over? Something so perfect, something that was anticipated for so long, something that consumed my thoughts for six months during the planning... Over. I realized that I'd have to deal with those feelings of loss when I got back to Tianjin...

But for now, time to enjoy the honeymoon!

Saturday Night Fever (6c)

THE RECEPTION

After the emotional ceremony and the excitement of the elephant ride, everyone was geared up! We were ready to party! The commotion, the controlled-chaos and the craziness during the reception ended up being much more than anticipated. It was a TOTAL BLAST!

THE ENTRANCE

In true American fashion, we had each couple come up with a little dance to do when they were introduced into the reception. This was especially entertaining since each American had a Chinese partner to walk in with so we first had to explain the concept and how it would work. Our Chinese partners latched onto this idea immediately (much like everything else...they all fell in love with the traditions of a Western ceremony!) So we came up with our little jigs then prepared to go in. Our entrance was a somewhat curvy,somewhat narrow staircase lined with candles so this in itself was challenging for me and my dress. And, along with that, it took all those guests at least 20 minutes to get settled into their seats - I told you, everyone was geared up!! We finally entered as our names were called and each couple was greeted with hoots and hollers galore! The atmosphere of the whole place was so pumped up, so energetic, so celebratory...amazing! Haike and I entered and he dipped me back for a kiss...unfortunately, our sync was a bit off and the kiss ended up being quite private...faced away from the group, haha! :)





THE DECORATIONS

When we entered the reception, we were greeted with so much beauty...from the smiling faces of our family and friends to the immaculate decorations - every detail was perfect! (I had not seen them yet, by the way.) Take a look...











THE M.C.

Our lovely M.C. was my incredibly talented friend, Sonja. Sonja is from Germany but can speak fluent Chinese and English. She came to Tianjin at the same time as me - we were instant friends. Haike and I knew she would be the perfect M.C., operating as her own translator as she greeted, gave instructions, introduced different parts of the reception and prayed for our meal in her second and third languages. Our family and friends couldn't say enough wonderful things about what an amazing job she did!!! Thank you sooooo much, Sonja!



THE BAND

We hired a local jazz band to play during the reception...they were beyond cool! They filled the room with a vibe of relaxation and celebration and nearly everyone was swaying to the music, singing along or just feeling the very distinct aura of the band.

One of the highlights of the jazz band was when they played, "Loving You," well-known by the Americans and the Chinese. Chai and Yiqi were the first ones to try to hit the high notes (missing horribly, as does anyone who tries to do that in this song) and soon the whole room was belting it out - hilarious!!



THE TOASTS

While the first course of dinner was being served, the toasts began. As you have maybe read from some of my previous posts; toasting is somewhat of an art-form and a MUST at all Chinese gatherings, especially weddings. The Chinese guests knew that they needed to go from table to table, toasting the other guests and saying "ganbei!" (Kind of like "cheers" but in some situations it means that the guests should empty their cup). Soooo...this was expected from the Chinese. But, as in many situations, the unexpected happened. My dad, stepmom, uncle and grandma were sitting at a table with some Americans who used to live in China. Apparently those Americans quickly introduced the concept of "ganbei" to my family and here the madness began. As soon as Haike and I were introduced and sat down to enjoy a drink and appetizer, we saw the people at my dad's table migrating to the table with Haike's parents. I heard my dad and uncle excitedly yell "ganbei" and raise their glasses. As my mind registered this strange happening, I turned to Haike and asked, "WHO taught them ganbei!?!?" For the next hour the toasts contined like clockwork. Each table traveled to all the other tables and sudden outbursts of "GANBEI!" could be heard throughout the room. As the groom, Haike was given special attention and within the hour, I knew that all those emptied glasses were going to result in a very "happy" guy. I was right! Ganbei!





THE DINNER

Our delicious dinner, organized by the resort and our wedding planners, was a beautiful display of presentation and taste! Our 6 course meal had so many different flavors, all traditional Thai food. Even the dessert was individually handcrafted with each plate showing S&H above the delicately-placed dessert. A small flag was stuck on top with our picture, along with a note saying, "thanks for sharing in our day!" Every detail was paid attention to, every plate decorated with care.













THE SPEECHES

While the food was still coming and everyone was holding their bellies from the sheer amount of food, the speeches began. First up was Haike's dad - short, sweet and well-rehearsed. Next up were the Ingleby's - my dad, mom, uncle, stepmom and grandma. Each of them with a distinct style. Dad - the guy who'd done just a few too many ganbeis and entertained us all with a story about Haike. The story was long, made even longer with the in-between-sentence-translations. Mom - from the heart, sincere. Uncle Mike - well-written beforehand with so many memories and stories, this speech brought tears to my eyes and landed Mike a permanent spot as "favorite uncle." :) Kristi - "Thank you!" Grandma - a "welcome to the family" for Haike and his parents. The relationship that was formed between my grandma and Haike's mom throughout the week was a thing of wonders and something captivating to be seen. Dabi, Haike's best man - did his own translations which was very meaningful - he has proven to be the best friend a guy could ever ask for. Lindsey - a testament to the strength and bond of sisters. Laura - quoting "The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost as a way to describe my journey, thus far. It was a very touching indication to me of the way some people view my life choices. All of the speeches were so moving and so rehearsed. It was an unforgettable moment.









THE CAKE

We cut a massive piece of cake, I put a little bit of frosting on Haike's nose, we fed each other, kissed...voila. Done.





THE LANTERNS

Since we had a nice mix of Western and Chinese culture throughout the ceremony and reception we decided to also infuse a little bit of Thai culture. This was another surprise planned for the guests and they were excited to have yet another new, cultural experience. Everyone headed outside to the open area in front of the main building where about 15 paper lanterns were waiting in a circle, with one large paper lantern sitting in the middle of the circle. Haike and I went to the large one and lit ours; first holding the top of the lantern and then lifting it up to hold the bottom as the candle began to heat it. We let all 15 lanterns float up into the sky as a symbol of leaving bad luck and worries behind us as we look forward to the future. The sight was incredible to behold.







THE DANCING

Haike and I started the dancing off with our first dance to "When You Say Nothing At All." Many of our guests found it ironic that we chatted through the entire song. :) Then, I danced with my dad and Haike with his mom. After that, we pulled everyone onto the dance floor (and I mean EVERYONE) and the real chaos began! Some of the highlights:





* Teaching "YMCA" to the Chinese crowd, including Haike's parents. It was sooooo fun to watch them all catch on and really enjoy the song.

* Seeing Haike's mom come out of her shell as she first danced with her husband (Haike had never seen them dance before...) and then with Uncle Mike!

* Watching Uncle Mike dance with Haike's good friend, Amy. They had great rhythm and were so entertaining to watch!



* Kristi starting a train that went all the way downstairs, past the reception desk and back up. I think every guest, wedding planner, hotel employee and caterer was pulled in. At the end of the night the hotel manager praised our group saying we were the friendliest and most fun group they'd ever hosted. They thoroughly enjoyed having us there. What can I say?? It's so true.



THE FLOWER GIRL

Lizzy became quite attached to Haike and I throughout the day and we loved having her around! She was such a little trooper...it was a long day! Lizzy's dress was quite layered and I have so many images of her walking around in imitation of me...holding the dress up to her knees so as not to trip. Several times throughout the day she even asked me to help her smooth the layers as they were "itchy." During the reception Lizzy visited us throughout the dinner, sat with us during the toasts, helped us with our lantern outside and even joined us for the end of our dance. We are so happy she was there!!!



THE CENTRAL ALUMNI PICTURE

It's tradition! Sure, there were only two of us who made it to this exotic location, but two strong!



THE WEDDING PLANNERS

This is Miao and May (Audrey not pictured). Together these three beautiful ladies helped to make all of these wonderful memories happen! I can't thank them enough...I will forever be grateful to them for creating this unforgettable week. Ladies, thanks for being part of the memories!



(P.S. I went kind of picture-crazy in this post...so many good ones! If you want to see the whole collection, let me know and I'll send you the link!)

THE END

...Or I suppose it's THE BEGINNING...

Cindy's Poem

This is the poem that Cindy wrote right after Haike and I got engaged. She read it during our ceremony, along with the rest of her amazing message! Thanks Cindy!!


It all began with that fateful email
The advent of the Shannon/Tony fairy tale
“He kissed me! What’s a girl to make of that?!”
“Are you out of your mind? Wait, did you kiss him back?”

Thousands of miles away, Tony had already fallen hard
I watch her with him on the phone, pacing around my backyard
her heart torn in more ways than one
she knows her time in China is just not done

And so it was, on that trip to discovery
She finds herself back in this country
back to her now couch-less apartment
dealing with the evil English department

She’s back! his wishes had come true!
it’s time for action, time to woo
“Cindy, how do I do it, what does she like?”
“Maybe I should google ‘how to get American girls to like a Chinese guy’”

In the end, it wasn’t what he DID that won her
It was being himself, his personality, his character
Because it really is true what they say
A boy’s skin color isn’t the last word of the day

It was months that passed before she agreed
to become Tony’s girlfriend, much to his jubilee!
And slowly but surely they grew in their love
And unwaveringly they felt the leading of the One from above

Now I wasn’t there the day when Tony proposed
Thanks to TianjinShannon.blogspot we all know how the story goes
But I can tell you when I knew this tale would end well
The moment I thought I began to hear wedding bells:

My dear friend Shannon, whose goodness is too good
how a man can regard her so highly, she never understood
says, “I really think he can be wonderful to me
my whole life” these words helped me see

Despite all the ups and downs of their journey
The good times, the bad, the mountains and valley
They’ve made it this far, so I think you’ll agree
Shannon and Tony were meant to be.

We don’t know yet what the future will hold
but that together the two of you will grow old
On the way may God fill you with so much love it spills over
and I know you will change the world forever.

Forever Came Today (6b)

5:18 PM - The ceremony begins. Why 5:18? Let me have Haike explain... "the times with 8 as an ending, like 5:08 or 5:18 or 5:28 are supposed to be good luck." Enough said!

If I could sum up the ceremony using single words I would choose these:

Impeccable.

Stunning.

Pure.

Everything.

I'm going to use this post to showcase all sorts of pictures and highlights from the ceremony - here we go!

Highlights:

* The decorations. Considering the fact that I had nearly nothing to do with them, they were perfectly suited for me and they were simple, yet alluring.













* Waiting for the ceremony to begin, for people to be seated, for the music to cue us in. Someone shouted, pointed and our eyes all followed their finger. A rainbow behind us. "Is this real? A rainbow just two minutes before we begin? A sign. He is always here."

* The line-up, preparing to walk in, watching my sisters and friends who had traveled such a long way to be there on that day - just to support us. Haike escorting his parents, my mom and stepmom, my grandma. Canon in D, piano version, almost like a breeze playing in the background. Lizzy, who earlier declared that she would not throw any flowers, chose to throw them - in handfuls directly onto the ground. We could hear the chuckles from where we stood.







* Walking with my dad. As every girl knows, this is one of the most important, special moments of her wedding day. It was no different for me. I can barely remember it now but I do remember this - my dad told me he was proud of me and that I had made a very good choice in Haike. This part I remember. I also remember being unable to hold back the tears as we turned the corner and I spotted Haike watching me from the front. How do you explain this moment, this feeling, this walk towards your new "home" - it's indescribable. But I can tell you that in that moment there was no doubt, only understanding and a deep well of gratitude for all that I have been blessed with.



* Cindy. My tender-hearted, honest, inspirational, realistic-dreaming friend...my cheerleader from the start. My voice of reason. Standing next to my future, waiting at the front. As I got closer to her, she also began crying and pulled at my heart strings in the most unimaginable way. She tried to begin the ceremony several times before being able to proceed. I remember not caring in the least, just wanting to give her a big hug.



* Opening words. An opening prayer. Emilie and Theresa reading from Colossians, "Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience..."

* A message from Cindy and Zhao Bin. Everything translated or recreated in a second language. Cindy's message was so moving, so encouraging, so spot-on what I needed to hear. She read a poem that she had written shortly after Haike and I got engaged (it will be added as a separate post following this one!) Everyone was crying, laughing, nodding, smiling. Zhao Bin gave an honest, open and enduring message - a modern testament to his faith.

* My high-heeled shoes sinking deeper and deeper into the soft ground, creating two micro-drills, digging the memory of the day far into the earth.

* Our vows - Haike said them first, in English and in Chinese. I meekly said my vows in English, trying to hold back the crack that was fighting at the edge of my voice. Though meek and gentle, the words were said with clarity and conviction. I prepared myself for the surprise I knew was coming. Though earlier I had apologized intensely to Haike for not being able to learn the Chinese vows, I had another intent. I learned them, I practiced them and when Cindy handed me the "cheat-sheet" I knowingly thrust it into a fist behind me and recited those words straight from my heart. The look of surprise and awe on Haike's face will be etched into my, and our guest's minds as one of the most wonderful moments of the day. Haike later recalled it as the best part of the day for him, as well.



* The exchanging of rings. A release of emotion when we all shared a laugh as Haike's best man only gave us one of the rings, leaving us short-handed and glancing around in confusion. No problem - it was still in his pocket and was soon express-delivered to my waiting finger.



* A Chinese love song by my Chinese sister, Yiqi. While she was singing, Haike and I moved to take part in our sand ceremony, a combining of two colors of sand to symbolize our lives shifting into one. When we finished, Zhao Bin motioned for me to mix the colors together - another laugh, and I listened. We enjoyed Yiqi's song, it was so beautiful - her voice and gaze melting together to create an entrancing story. As she sang, a breeze caught her hair and then drifted through my veil. Nearly the first breeze in the 6 days that we'd been in Chiang Mai. A butterfly soared through the ceremony site. These things could never have been planned by any human in the world. Chelsea - yours had nothing on mine.






* The tea ceremony. A Chinese tradition. We pulled out chairs for our parents and my grandma. They came to the front and sat down. Haike served my parents and grandma first - as they accepted the tea, they accepted him into the family. My grandma was surprised when told she didn't need to drink it all. Then, I served Haike's parents, "please drink this tea." We helped them back to their seats.







* Time to kiss! Cindy pronounced us as the new couple and Zhao Bin urgently reminded us to wait for the translation before the kiss. "Okay, NOW it's time!"



* As we were leaving, I was becoming anxious...a surprise was planned. A BIG surprise was planned but where was it? My wedding planner came running towards me. "It's not here yet! We need to stall!" So, as everyone came out we shared hugs all around and whoops of joy and congratulations were shouted in Haike and my direction. I needed to keep them in this spot...all of them... so I suggested a group photo. Many of them said, "why don't we do it up at the main building, on the stairs?" But the bride spoke and was heard... "Nope, we're doing it here!" We had to wait, the surprise was sooo good. The wait was worth it. First I saw the fingers pointing, then the gasps, then all heads turned in one direction and the cameras came out.





A giant elephant was walking towards us and stopped directly in front of the group. She knelt down onto her front legs then lowered her back legs until she was laying on her stomach. Only a few people knew she was coming. No one could believe what was about to happen - were we going to ride it?!?! Miao grabbed a small table and pulled it over to the elephant. Haike stepped on it, then hopped on up. Next, it was my turn and it was undoubtedly more difficult. I think, in the end, I had 4 people pushing from behind and Haike pulling from on top. My job was to keep the bottom of my dress pulled up, and in doing so, keep the top of my dress from falling down! We made it! The elephant stood up and as it turned around we heard more cheering as the group saw the words, "Just Married" propped on the back of the elephant. Everyone followed us as we took a short walk around the resort then back to the main building. I pretty much fell off the elephant into Haike's waiting arms and then everyone posed for picture after picture with the beautiful creature. It was an exhilarating and joyous moment. A celebration.













Let the party begin...